Wear your armor

I’ve never really mentioned much my love for theatre.  I acted in community theatre since I was about six all the way up till I was around 26.   I loved it.   I grew up in a small rural area of South Georgia.   When I started college my acting coach was one of Meryl Streep’s acting coach’s.   He even had a picture of her in his office when she was really young.   I wouldn’t say I was a great actor.   I was a nervous actor though.   Every night before the curtain’s opened I was a wreck, no matter what I just couldn’t kick the jitters.   But then the curtains would open and I would perform.   I loved it after the curtains opened.   I’m not really sure why I quit something I loved so much.   I quit after I moved here to Jacksonville, Florida.   I have never even checked into any theatre although there are many.   I really have to get back into it.    I guess when I moved here I just didn’t feel I had the time.   I wouldn’t say I’m a wonderful actor, it’s been over 10 years since I’ve even acted.   But it would be interesting to audition.  

The first big production I remember seeing was Andrew Lloyd Webber’s musical “The Phantom of the Opera”.   Where a young chorus girl named Christine Daae received voice training from a mysterious musician she calls the “Angel of Music.”  Well I’m sure many of you know the story.  As the plot thickens we all find out the mysterious mentor is really a demented man who wants to carry her away into a bizarre underworld beneath the opera house.   He’s evil masquerading as good.

Writing about this makes me think of our realationship with Christ, and all we face.   I leave in the morning hoping I have enough armor on myself.   I know God made it just for me.  It was made for you too.

Wow it's been a long time since I posted.   Well my back went out on July 1st of this year, and today is my first day back at work since it went out.   I had a miserable 20 days of pain, but am just very thankful to be back at work today.   Still hurting a bit but nothing compared to the pain I was feeling.   I've been going to the chornic pain clinic and I feel like they will be helping me through all the pain.   Mike has been really good through all this.   It's been rough, but all in all I think the hard part of it is over.   I'm really feeling much better.  Well I better get back to work.   Just wanted to say hey and that's I'm o.k.   Hope everyone out there has a great weekend!

My new photo blog at shutterchance

Check out my new photoblog at shutterchance!

 

http://photosbyderek.shutterchance.com/

Reading old jounrals

I've been sitting here tonight going through old journals I've written. I sit here and laugh sometimes, at moments I wonder who this person was? Was this person me? I wrote of beginnings, many beginnings. Of endings, almost as many. Then I read the last page of one of my journals that I ended on June 21st, 1993. Hmm maybe another idea, maybe take quotes from my old journals from years ago, once a month, we'll see. This is what I wrote.

Well, the last page at last. Always my favorite page. I've been thinking of how to end this. My English 101 teacher Dr. Campbell believed the last phrase connects with the entirity of your writing. But this won't mark an end to my writing, I'm sure there will be more to write about in the future, and maybe one day I will be looking back and reading all these pages, and this page. I wonder what my life will bring?

Beginnings and Endings

The beginning can be awkward, interesting, easy, quick plundging us into involvement. Endings are usually wise, very sad, stressful, and functional. The end is always yet to come. But I have today to laugh, cry, shout, love, and be myself so I'm not worrying about an end.

Thought that was cool that I found this old journal of 1993 tonight. I think I have about 14 old journals now.

Happy Birthday Mike

Happy Birthday Mike

I still remember how I felt the first time I saw you. There was something about you that I couldn't forget. Maybe it was your eyes or maybe your smile- or maybe the way you flirted with me, all the things that I have since come to know so well. Whatever it was, I remember that it drew me in and took a hold of me in a way I couldn't ignore. Now when I look at you, I see someone who's become so incredible important in my life. Yet there are still moments when I feel the mystery and charm, the same invisible power pulling me to you just as it did when we first met. The birthday weekend will be officially over in a few hours, thank goodness I think I wore you out and we're about to hit the sack. Here's a few pictures from the weekend. Happy Birthday!

Gay Day Disney

Well we left Friday night after work for our weekend trip to Orlando for the 16th annual Gay Day at Disney. I've been before about 7 years ago. This was Mike's first time. How would I describe it? It was very different for me than years ago. Years ago it meant something different than it did this time. We wore our church shirts that says "God is still speaking" I think we were stopped almost every few seconds asking about our shirts. I got many mixed feelings from it, most being very positive. But some very negative. I being a gay man have felt the aggravation of religion at times and I remember the churches 7 years ago with their signs of hate. But this year I felt something new. Of being a gay man that loves God. I actually had some gay people come up to me thinking I was straight and trying to convert them to being straight. Just because my shirt said "God is still speaking". Before I could tell the person I was gay myself, they just went on and on about I was trying to take their rights away from them. After they ranted for a few minutes. I finally was able to tell them. Hey I'm gay, and it's o.k. They were kind of embarrassed that they just assumed I was straight and trying to convert them because I had the word God on my shirt. I also got much positve feedback from other U.C.C. members around the U.S. and other's that had seen our commercial. I'll have to get all my thoughts about this one together, but I definately feel a entry about it. Other than that, the day was wonderful. Mike and I had a blast with our church family. And seeing the masses of red shirts we saw. Mike even got his Davy Crockett racoon hat. We didn't take lots of pictures. But we got a few. We stayed at the Magic Kingdom from opening till around 7, and went to Downtown Disney for dinner, and a night of dancing at Pleasure Island, Mike and I had our shirts off dances with shirtless men on a revolving dance floor till closing.

The Whale

The Whale

If you read the front page story of the SF Chronicle,
you would have read about a female humpback whale
who had become entangled in a spider web of crab traps
and lines. She was weighted down by hundreds of pounds of traps that caused
her to struggle to stay afloat. She also had hundreds of yards of
line rope wrapped around her body, her tail, her torso, a line
tugging in her mouth.

A fisherman spotted her just east of the FarraloneIslands (outside the  and radioed an environmental group for help. Within a few hours, the rescue team arrived and determined that she was so bad off, the only way to save her was to dive in and untangle her ... a very dangerous proposition. One slap of the tail could kill a rescuer.

 

They worked for hours with curved knives and eventually freed her.
When she was free, the divers say she swam in what seemed like joyous circles.
Shethen came back to each and every diver, one at a time, and nudged them, pushed gently around-     she thanked them. Some said it was the most incredibly beautiful experience of their lives.

The guy who cut the rope out of her mouth says her eye was
following him the whole time, and he will never be the same.

May you, and all those you love,

be so blessed and fortunate ...
to be surrounded by people
who will help you get untangled
from the things that are binding you. And, may you always know the joy
of giving and receiving gratitude. I pass this on to you, my jland friends, in the same spirit.