Thursday, March 24, 2005

Mike

I've looked back in happiness at all I've been through and all my experiences.  I'm recounting my experiences to break some stereotypes.  I want people to know that being gay and finding love is possible.  We meet the problems of everyday living and find ways to establish trust and love.   I've met someone and am very happy to share something so wonderful.

This is the paragraph I used to describe my journal but it is rare that I speak of the person that I share my life with every day.  So I thought it was time to let you in on a little bit about this person that is a big part of my life, and soon we will even be living together, as soon as we can figure a few things out, certain dates.  But all in all we already do live together.  I think I've only spent a couple days away from him or he me in many months.   I write about many things in my journal, my thoughts, my dreams, but yet somehow I seem to leave out or not really leave out, but maybe not stress this person, and how much they mean to me.  A friend told me today in an email how important it is for her to be very honest about the joy and love that she has with her partner.  "It honors that love, teaches people that we are little different from them in our wants and needs (which is a HUGE concept for some).  Well I have found that love and today is the day I thought I'd say it, in an entry.  Mike means the world to me.  I've been sick the last few days, and him being there for me while I was sick, to make sure I was taking my medicine when I needed too, or making me some water or 7-up, or just putting up with my whining.  Today I was extra irratible.  Everything just seemed to be coming in on me, and I just seemed to be pushing, Mike included.  Maybe it has been fear that I don't talk about the one that I love, fear of judgement, fear of many things, I've made so many friends on here in J-land, and I guess I thought if I stayed away from my extreme close personal life I would be ok.  Anyway.  I have someone special, and I love looking into his eyes when he's smiling, sometimes I can even read his mind and tell what he's thinking when I'm looking at them.  He always hugs me before I leave, or I hug him before I leave.  I just wanted to say thank you Mike, for being in my life, and for all that you mean to me.  And also wanted to say I'm sorry for being so irritable while I've been sick.  It will get better.  And remember it's not all about you, it's all about ME!  Just kidding.  I love you!  Ok, now this means I can tell everyone on the internet about how  clutter drives me crazy, and me picking my toes drives you crazy.  Thanks for so many things, for being proud of me when I finished that last step of the Gate, and waiting there with the camera and taking pictures.  Thanks for being you!

13 comments:

mumma4evr said...

what a beautiful entry!!!!  
Becky

eynl said...

Derek,
This is a beautiful entry of your love.  :)
Carol

dcmeyer420 said...

Awwww, Mike sounds like a great guy. Those who will judge you base on your lifestyle are not your friends to begin with. Do what you want and be happy. True friends take you for who you are and will be happy when you are.

robinngabster said...

Awww...what a lovely entry. I am going to send a link from your journal to my friend Brian..keep and eye out for him. He is a real sweetie and I think he would like your journal!  get better!

barbpinion said...

God says we are to love one another, not judge one another. It's difficult to speak of sometimes. Our world, though lovely, does contain hateful people. But there are also loving one, as you have found out in J-land. Nice entry. (((Derek)))
*Barb*

gbgoglo said...

Awww, Derek, this is an awesome entry.  Mike, nice to know you and thank you for taking care of and putting up with our Derek while he's sick.  You must be a wonderful person because I know Derek is and he wouldn't settle for less than Mr. Wonderful.  Take care, Derek.  Feel better soon.  Hugs to you and yours, gloria

coy1234787 said...

     Great entry! Mike has kind, smiling eyes and if he makes you happy then that makes us happy! I love being part of such a diverse community where we are able to share such details about our lives!
                      *** Coy ***  

nhd106 said...

Great entry Derek, and from the heart!  You both seem to be a good catch for each other!    Nancy

deabvt said...

Terrific, Derek...Sounds like Love!
Good for you!
V

judithheartsong said...

I am late in coming but am so delighted to see this entry my friend. He is a beautiful soul, you are a beautiful soul.... and your love is honored here. I am so happy for you. judi

onestrangecat said...

Mike sounds like a wonderfun man. You are lucky to have found him.

Kathy

tdain2003 said...

Derek,
Thank you for stopping by the J-Land Times.... and leaving a comment with your link!  I'm so glad to have read your journal.  This entry made me cry!  I'm happy for you and for Mike and I know he appreciates this entry... it's so nice to be told how much you mean to someone.  I hope you'll stop by my regular journal.  I know I'll be back here!
Tracy

dimundntheruf69 said...

I am a person who tries to never judge another no matter what the circumstance...our heart is our heart and we feel what we feel...and we can't change that no matter how hard we try...I have been almost in your shoes....and now I guess since you are sharing I will too...I am white and I fell in love with a black man 15 years older than myself...now I dont share that with just anyone....LOL..but I want you to know its about the same thing...you are afraid of what people will think, I know...until my father thought I quit seeing said black man he refused to speak to me..and i was always a Daddy's girl and even after he thought I had "seen the light" it took my near death experience to bring him to my hospital bedside and look into my eyes and tell me he loved me for the first time in about 5 very long years...and now even though I'm not as happy and content with my current relationship...my father is happy as a little clam....Sigh!So I think, even though I am a "Christian"..i really just consider myself a child of God...because sometimes we "christians" are the biggest judges of all...and quickly condemn each other without ever giving one another the opportunity to just "love our brother"....christie
http://journals.aol.com/dimundntheruf69/adayinthelife