Broke

Sometimes I sit and think about how broke I am all the time!  J So how much does money matter to me, not enough I guess, cause I never seem to have it.  Sometimes I wonder if I did have money what direction would it go in.  How would I spend my money?  How do I spend my money now?  Sometimes I feel like I’m a slave to it, and I never even have it.  I think when I don’t have it, what I could be doing, or I sit around in lullsville, well not always but sometimes.  Funny I’m thinking about money, maybe because I know how broke I am, and know I don’t get paid till Friday, plus I was a little sad that I didn’t have much to give in the offering.  Money really doesn’t matter that much to me.  I’ve never really had a lot, so I guess I’ve never really been one to want material things, I have had them given to me before, and I’ve also been friends with those with great riches and who were very depressed.  So I know money isn’t the answer to anything.    I’ve heard the saying before “For a quick check on your heart, check out your checkbook.”  If that was true though I wouldn’t have much of a heart.  But maybe it means how you feel about knowing how much you have.  I have riches in my life that I am very thankful for.  O.K. all this said, I still wish I could win the lottery, after all I do live in Florida. I am telling myself in words that I don’t want more, but what is my heart really saying.  I’m yearning for more, and sometimes I wonder if more, means money?  I know it doesn’t bring happiness, but I sure could use a little bit of it anyway