Wednesday, April 13, 2005

I'm looking here and there and everywhere

Sometimes I sit and think about my problems and my pain, yes I’m still having some backpain, and anyone that has had it can sympathize I’m sure.  But I don’t want to let the pain take over, and it’s not pain 100% of the time.  How often do I sit and think about what is the crisis of the day.  Turn on the news.  It’s terrorism and it’s random threats.  Or look around me at the people they are laying off, or poor Mike still looking for a job, the economy and the fear that we will run out of money before we run out of time.  We all have bad things that happen or may be happening, when I complained about my back the other day, I got an response on my entry for prayers because of my back from someone that would pray for me, because she knew about pain and had been out on disability for the last year and a half.  I ask for everyone to remember cyndygee in your prayers.  Everyone feels pain from time to time, some excruciating, some just the pains of every day.  Sometimes fear can do some terrible things to us, I’m not saying some things aren’t just physical but I think much is in the mind.  My mom used to read these books I remember as a teenager, and every now and then I would grab one after she finished not asking,  I figured if it’s good enough for her, that I should be able to read it too.  Most of the times I was ok, unless it was some big romance novel, I didn’t care for those.  But this one was really good.  It was about a lady who went through great sadness, pain, and heartache with grace.  Grace, something I wished for my sister’s wedding today “plantings of grace”.  This woman I read about was Corrie ten Boom who lived through the horror of lifein a Nazi concentration camp- a place where hope was lost for most people.  This book grabbed my attention first because “The Diary of Anne Frank” was one of the first books that really moved me.  So I thought this one would too.  Unlike Anne Frank Corrie Ten Boom survived to tell her story of unfaltering faith and tight fisted hope in God, she even somehow got a Bible in with her even though they stripped her of every cloth.  She saw the face of evil up close and personal.  From her writings I know she saw so much pain and inhumane acts man can do to man.  And when she came out of it all, she said this:  “If you look at the world, you’ll be distressed.  If you look within, you’ll be depressed.  But if you look at Christ, you’ll be at rest.”  I write this and goosebumps come up over me.  I ask myself lately where am I looking for my answers?  Am I focusing on what’s wrong and what I can’t control.  Am I looking inward, hoping I can find my own answers through trial and error.  Or am I truly looking where Corrie says it so well, where I will find rest.  Keep me in your prayers as I keep all of you in mine, everyone in J-Land, and all over.  In love and light. Peace out! 

7 comments:

gabreaelinfo said...

Sometimes bad things happen to good people. Sometimes good things happen to bad people. Sometimes good people do bad things. Sometimes bad people do good things. No one knows the mind of God. There has been times in my life when I REALLY wanted something and it wasn't given to me, no matter how much I prayed. Reflecting back over time now I see if I had those things / done those things my life would had been very different now. You see God always gives us what we need, which isn't always what we want.

Take Care,
Gabreael
http://journals.aol.com/gabreaelinfo/GabreaelsBodyMindSpiritJournal/

indigosunmoon said...

Bless you Derek.  Hope you feel better
soon sweetie.
Love,
Connie

toonguykc said...

I don't really pray because I'm not religious...but I do know that thinking of someone and wishing them good thoughts & healing vibes is pretty much the same thing.  Right?  I wish you were closer so I could take good care of you and make sure you don't overdo it.    Russ

judithheartsong said...

big hugs your way my friend. judi

cneinhorn said...

youre in my thoughts derek....feel better.

~ www.jerseygirljournal.com

eternallife23 said...

If you look at the world, you’ll be distressed.  If you look within, you’ll be depressed.  But if you look at Christ, you’ll be at rest.”
Wonderful entry You will continue to be in my prayers. *Louise*

gbgoglo said...

I know where to look, but like you, I sometimes focus on what's wrong and beyond my control instead of looking at Christ...prayers,Derek.  gloria